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Indoor Plumbing is for Suckers (aka Pioneer Days 2012)

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So I'm at work the other day, just about to leave for lunch, and I get a call from my neighbor, Nosy Nancy.  We're not exactly good friends, this lady and I.  We're not mortal enemies or anything, but she and I have some fundamental differences that make it impossible for us to be friends. For example, I understand the bath-towel-invisibility-cloak rule: If you see your neighbor going from

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